The Holidays present a time challenge to everyone, especially parents; not only must we continue to provide and arrange, but we have the added responsibility to create holiday magic for our kids. With an increased workload, it can be all too easy to lose sight of ourselves and our own needs. The catch-22, of course, is that it’s when we have the least amount of time for self care that we require it most. To keep yourself operating at peak capacity this holiday season, check out these quick S.E.L.F. care tips to maintain adequate levels of sleep, exercise, love, and fun.
There’s only one thing more frustrating than not being able to clear your own clutter—and that is coming home at the end of a stressful day and being confronted with your kid’s mess. It feels like facing your own failure as a parent. You want to teach them a life skill that you know will make their life easier and lead to more success... But how can you teach something you yourself don’t even know how to do?
When Glenn Close won a Golden Globe for her role in “The Wife” earlier this year she said something in her acceptance speech that made me stand up in my own living room and say “Preach!” She talked about her mother, (who’d spent her life supplementing herself to her father), and who, in her eighties, told Close that she felt hadn’t accomplished anything because of it…
As we begin the New Year, parents, everywhere, are recommitting to being more present with their children -- whether that means leaving work at the office or spending less time on their phones. Amidst all this resolve is one uncomfortable truth that often goes unsaid: hanging with your kids, no matter how much you love them, can be boring…
Mention “parenting book” to moms and dads and you’ll see shoulders tighten, and a tinge of worry cross their face that communicates: "The last thing I need is a book that will put more on my plate. Or make me feel worse about my parenting than I already do. Besides, who has time to read?!"
Most families I coach struggle with their morning routines. One shoe is always misplaced. Someone’s always in danger of missing the bus or being late to a meeting….
It never ceases to astound how the duties of running a household are, by and large, considered a mother’s domain. Now often referred to as “emotional labor,” this burden is getting a lot more attention these days.
The common cry I hear from from moms and dads everywhere is this: How do I balance all the stuff I need to do for my kids, with all the things I need to do for my life?
If you are like most parents I know, the end of summer brings about dual emotions: relief, that the kids are finally going back school; and angst, that life is about to kick back into high gear.
Q: I always have trouble getting out the door in the morning. There’s never enough time and someone always ends up forgetting something! How can I get out of the house without missing a beat?
A: Getting out the door in the morning can be hectic and stressful for anybody! Morning madness beleaguers even the most organized households; coordinating bathroom, eating, and exit schedules is no small feat.
Lots of parents struggle with knowing what their role is when it comes to their kids’ and school. Should I (gasp) do their homework with them, to be sure it’s done right? Or should I stay out of it completely? How important is it to join the PTA, anyway?
As any perfectionist will tell you, advice to just “know when good enough is good enough” or “take it easy” fall on deaf ears. Asking a perfectionist to quit being a perfectionist is like asking a bird to quit flying; it’ll never work.
Q: I work from home, and with my kids home for the summer, I am having a hard time getting things done. What should I do?
A: Working from home brings a certain sense of freedom– you can set your own schedule, create your own office culture, and perhaps best of all, relish the joys of the world’s shortest commute.
The scene: You’re finally alone with your spouse, out for a nice dinner, and all you can talk about are the kids.
Did you talk to Ms. So-and-So about the science project?
Are you taking [the kid] to piano lessons on Saturday or am I?
What do you do when 30 minutes of free time falls in your lap? A client with two school aged kids shared this story the other day:
“Pat was grocery shopping, Max was at a playdate, Eliana was taking a nap. I suddenly found myself with a glorious window of time and I should have done something fun, but I had no idea what to do with myself.”
For many families, summer is the most relaxing of all seasons. Without the hustle and bustle of school-year schedules and homework, everyone has an easier time relaxing and living in the moment.
By early June, kids are excited for the last day of school and parents -- eager as they are for a break from the daily grind -- are thinking, what the heck are we gonna do for the next three months? Every parent lives in fear of hearing their kids say those two little words: “I’m bored.”
Ever lose your temper with your kids within the first five or 10 minutes of walking in the door? I hear this from clients all the time: “I’ve had long day and just need a little space before I can handle the onslaught!” Switching gears -- between work and home, fast-paced adult world and a kid’s dawdling pace – is one of the biggest challenges parents face.
We have become a nation of phone zombies. Everywhere I go, people are looking at their phones – on street corners, park benches, in line at the grocery store, waiting for the subway, even while out to dinner with other people. Just like table manners and four-letter-words, kids imitate what their parents do. If you want your kids to have a healthy relationship with technology, you must model it yourself. Here’s how.
Exercise is often one of the first things to go when parents feel spread too thin. People say they don’t have time. Or that they are too tired. Or that they feel selfish taking time away from their kids. More often than not, though, moms and dads just don’t know how to fit exercise into a crammed schedule.
To fit in exercise, parents need to redefine what it means to work out.
In my early days as a professional organizer, my company was called Task Masters — with the tag line “we do life’s drudgery for you.” One year in mid-December, I got a call from a new prospect who wanted help preparing for the holidays. There were 2 weeks until Christmas, and she hadn’t had time to decorate her house, shop for gifts, wrap, send cards or prepare for Christmas dinner. We worked non-stop 8 hours per day for 8 days, and by December 24th everything was flawless and ready for its closeup
Time management is the art of accurately calculating how long things take, how to plan an appropriate amount of time for tasks and find more efficient ways to get them done. Wouldn’t it be great if your kids were good at it? Imagine the drama you can avoid by not having a nightly battle over homework, or a last-minute dinosaur diorama crisis, or a college essay deadline disaster…